Welcome to my blog. . . .

I am pessimistict, my husband hates it and sometimes it takes away from the happiness I have all around me and so. . . this blog is dedicated to finding something good in each day and being optimistic.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

not what I had planned.....

It's hard when you are at times in your life when nothing really seems predictable. Nothing seems certain, things don't seem as together as maybe you had wished or hoped. Maybe it's a time of change or a time you thought life was going to take you one way but it is going completely 180. We kinda feel like we are in that situation these days. My morning sickness has me feeling plain awful and the TV is on pretty much all day as my aid in raising my kids for the next couple weeks. The house is a mess. I miss getting up and ready and going on an outing with my sweet babies. On top of that our house just went up for sale and we have the feeling it's just time to go home.... to Mesa. Weather it sells or not we're still going, and do I have energy to pack up the house, heck no. The kids both have some crazy cough that has each of them up all hours of the night and I'm not even going to talk about our laundry mess. We have a lot of " what ifs" about this move and mr. husbands work and where we will be when new baby comes. I don't feel like I have control over anything on my plate. I don't feel like life is as pretty put together as I like it to usually be but guess what....... it will pass. I will get feeling better, we will move, figure things out and welcome a new addition into our arms because we are going through this little hiccup of morning sickness. My kids will get better and sleep better before I know it. The house will sell, or it wont, either way my family will be together and it will all work out. Doesn't it always? I am learning to just be content when things are not just as I would like them to be. There is still something to be learned, joy to be had and blessings to acknowledge. For example this time as a couch potato I have been able to just sit and watch my kids interact and play and it has been a beautiful thing. I have had more cuddle time and more time to listen to conference talks then in weeks past and I have learned to find joy in this change of pace. Not that any of these things are dramatic life happenings, they are still change and they can still be scary, but most of all they can be a time to grow if that is how I look at the situation. I just wanted to write and remind myself that change happens, uncertainties occur but we are in good hands, His hands and as long as that is never forgotten we will have joy.

7 notes:

Erin said...

Karla,

I totally understand about the life not going as you thought it would or hoped it would...but you at least have figured out what took me a while. Life goes on and after all, we can't change the way things are, but we can change ourselves to better our situation. Keep plugging along and by the way - NO! You may not move!! :) I would miss your adorable and sweet kids too much. Also, you're not a slouch either!

Amanda said...

That's sounds like how my first trimester went. I felt so bad. Everyday I just laid on the couch and I had to tell poor Hunter, "Not today, mommy doesn't feel good." That's really exciting about going back home though. I can't wait for when it's time for Jeff and I to go back home. I still owe you big time for coming over and cleaning my house, so please, please, call me when I can return the favor.

Makenzie said...

Just what I needed to hear. Thanks Karla. Miss you guys. stay in touch when you move

Camille said...

Uncertainty is the worst, but like you said, things always work out.

I don't know your whole story but I can relate to the pull of trying to get back to Mesa. That's my goal in life right now.

David and Shalynna said...

Oh, Karla, I'm sorry you've been so sick! I'm sure you feel stressed about the move, but it sounds like everything feels right so I'm sure things will work out just fine. I miss you. I will call you soon so we can catch up and talk about our pregnancies. :) Love you.

The Bunzells said...

I'm sorry things are so hectic and that you are not feeling well. But its so great that you are trying to put forth an optimistic attitude (something i'm rarely able to do in situations like these). You are right...in time you will feel better, and this will just be a bump in the road. Hooray for moving back to Mesa! Do you guys have a house you are buying or renting down here?

Sandra Nixon said...

Ditto! I feel just the same way: baby on the way, moving, overwhelmed. Thanks for putting it all into words and ending with some consolation. You are wonderful:)